Monday, May 7, 2012

Childrens's Mercy Hospital Stay 1: Part 2

This is a continuation.  You'll find the first part here.

Wednesday afternoon I was on the computer just outside of our room, while Landon slept on Daddy's chest.  I saw a man wearing surgical scrubs enter our room.  I quickly rushed in behind him.  He introduced himself to Scott and I then sat down.  He began to explain the process and procedures surrounding the complete removal of a colon.  I felt a wave of anxiety come over me and wasn't sure I was hearing things correctly.  Was he saying Landon was going to need this surgery.  So I asked that exact question.  His response to us was, "I spoke with the doctor who performed Landon's colonoscopy.  He is highly experienced and has been doing this work for over 30 years.  He told me Landon's colon is one of the most severe cases he has ever seen.  He needs to have his colon removed and we are putting him on the schedule for Friday morning".  I began to weep.  The surgeon continued with his medical explanations but all I could do was look at my son, sleeping in his Daddy's arms, and cry.  We shook hands and the surgeon left our room, after about 30 minutes of talking and answering our questions.  Scott and I hugged.  We both cried. 

Our parents came in and we talked with them about what was before us and the life changing event that was to take place Friday morning.  They were all very understanding and supportive of whatever Scott and I needed to do as parents.  We were all very emotional and upset.  They left that evening to go back to Wichita.  Scott and I talked more about what was happening and by the time he left to go back to The Ronald McDonald house, we had resigned ourselves that our baby boy would undergo surgery in just 2 days.

I was posting regular updates to Facebook for all of our family and friends back home, however, this is something I didn't post.  I just couldn't bring myself to put it in to writing.  I was terrified.

After Scott left that night I called a dear friend.  She and I talked for over an hour and I shared with her what had transpired that day.  She was completely supportive and loving, encouraging me to follow my heart while listening to my gut. 

I was unable to fall asleep, even after saying my nightly prayers.  I decided to pray again.  This time I pleaded with God, over and over again.  I prayed, "Please God, please tell me what we are supposed to do.  I need a very clear answer.  If you simply give me a sign I don't think I will see it.  Please, God, please.  Tell me what we are supposed to do.  Clearly show me.  I am trusting YOU to show me.  Please God.  I am lost.  I don't know what to do."  I repeated this for at least an hour then finally went to sleep around 2 a.m.

The nurses at Children's Mercy are fabulous.  They come in every few hours through the night and change diapers so the parents can rest.  I didn't see any of the diapers they changed that night.

The next morning I woke up feeling sad.  Landon seemed ok, all things considered.  Our team of doctors walked in and they were all smiling.  I thought, "how can you all be smiling at a time like this?!"  Then, one of them spoke up and said, "Well, it's amazing!  All of his bleeding has disappeared overnight!  We will be taking him off the schedule for surgery tomorrow morning."  I cried.  In that moment I looked down at Landon, who was on my lap, and silently thanked God.  I would say that's the clearest answer I could have been given.  I still thank God every single day for providing me exactly what I needed during my time of weakness and struggle.

The next few days just got better and better.  Landon was able to come off the IV nutrition and was eating real food again.  We got news that we may be able to get home in time for Christmas!  Aunt Shannon came to visit, which was a real blessing.  It was just 3 days until Christmas!  While she was there, Scott and I got to leave the hospital for a few hours.  We very quickly went to Target and Legends, where we were able to finish up our shopping.  It felt so good to be out together and feel somewhat normal again.

We were released from the hospital Christmas Eve morning.  We received our Christmas miracle!  Our appreciation for fresh air, outdoors with our little darling, was intensified.  We made it.

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